I Want to Trust You But I Don't - Review

I Want to Trust You, but I Don't: Moving Forward When You’re Skeptical of Others, Afraid of What God Will Allow, and Doubtful of Your Own Discernment

By: Lysa TerKeurst

Publication: October 8, 2024 by Thomas Nelson

256 pages

Genre: Non-Fiction, Self-Help, Christian

Source: Publisher via NetGalley (Thank you!!)

( Goodreads | Amazon )

*Note: The above link to Amazon is an affiliate links. Affiliate links support giveaways for Somewhere Only We Know readers.

Goodreads description--New York Times bestselling author Lysa TerKeurst shows you what to do with your skepticism and distrust so you can heal from past betrayals and move forward with strength and resilience.

Trust is the oxygen of all human relationships. But it's also what trips you up after you've been burned. Maybe a friend constantly lets you down. A leader or organization you respect turns out to be different than they portray themselves to be. A spouse cheats on you. A family member betrays you. You're exhausted by other people's choices and starting to question your own discernment. And you're wondering, If God let this happen, can he even be trusted?

How can you live well and step into the future when you keep stumbling over trust issues? Lysa TerKeurst says it's not simply about finding better people to walk with. It's about developing the stability you long for within yourself and with God, so you don't become cynical and carry a broken belief system into every new relationship.

In I Want to Trust You, But I Don't, Lysa shows you how to identify which of the eleven relational red flags are stirring up distrust, so you can pinpoint why you're feeling uneasy;stop having more faith in your fears coming true than God coming through for you by asking crucial "what if" questions to better process your doubts;recognize when a fractured relationship can be repaired by considering a reasonable list of characteristics necessary for rebuilding trust; andunderstand the physical, emotional, and neurological impact of the betrayals you've experienced and start healing from the inside out.

In a world where so many things feel alarming, this book will give you a peace that isn't dependent on unpredictable people, circumstances, and experiences. Instead, it offers practical and biblical ways to make real progress toward healthier perspectives, relationships, and a future you can authentically look forward to.

I've read several books by Lysa TerKeurst, but I've not read them all. The last one I read was Forgiving What You Can't Forget which was about the healing and restoration of her marriage. I don't follow her so I was surprised when I dove into this book to find out that her marriage didn't survive afterall. I hate it for her. This book was written from a place where her hurt and trauma could be felt. I felt so bad for her, while also being able to relate on some levels. Of course, none of us have experienced exactly the same hurts and betrayals.

I have to say that while I have come a long way from a lot of my own truama and personal betrayals, I still find myself struggling to trust at times. And I still find myself trying to control all the things I have no business trying to control. This book brought some of those experiences back to the forefront of my mind, which I didn't want. I do want to move forward, truly forgive fullly, and move on. So bringing some of these memories back to the surface was a painful experience for me. And I had to proceed slowly through this book. I couldn't just plow through it. I ended up putting it down for quite a long time before returning and finishing it.

If you have been betrayed and you hope to regain some of the trust that was lost, I would recommend this book as a resource for you. I think Lysa has some good tips. It's always helpful to know that we aren't alone and that we haven't experienced something that no one else in the world has experienced. So comisserating and seeing how someone else processed their pain can be helpful. I appreciate her attempts to always be learning from God during her life no matter if that's from pain or joy. I strive to do the same in my own.

I always appreciate that Lysa often narrates her own books. I switched back and forth between listening to this on audio and reading it. Both are equally good. I didn't find myself rating this as 5 Stars probably for a couple of reasons 1) my trauma and betrayal isn't new and these aren't feelings I'm actively working through, 2) I had to put this book down for a long time and having a big gap in the reading experience caused continuity issues for me. This is solely my fault and no fault of the book itself, but it does affect my experience reading it. Either way, I'm giving I Want to Trust You But I Don't 4.5 Stars. Have you read or listened to I Want to Trust You But I Don't? What did you think? Let me know!

Ten Random Books On My TBR List

Top Ten Tuesday was created by The Broke and the Bookish in June of 2010 and was moved to That Artsy Reader Girl in January of 2018. It was born of a love of lists, a love of books, and a desire to bring bookish friends together. This week's topic is Ten Random Books On My TBR List

1. # 101 The Notorious Virtues (The Notorious Virtues, # 1) by Alwyn Hamilton
2. # 94 I Want to Trust You But I Don't by Lysa TerKeurst
3. # 54 When Calls the Heart by Janette Oke
4. # 131 Variation by Rebecca Yarros
5. # 116 The Seventh Champion (The Dragon Queen Duology, # 1) by Sylvia Mercedes
6. # 113 Phantasma (Wicked Games, # 1) by Kaylie Smith
7. # 48 Loving By Leading by Den A Trumball MD
8. # 90 The Monstrous Kind by Lydia Gregovic
9. # 110 Fallen City (Fallen City Duology, # 1) by Adrienne Young
10. # 85 Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John M. Gottman

Are any of these books on your TBR list? Let me know!

Ten Books Released in 2024 That I Didn't Get To

Top Ten Tuesday was created by The Broke and the Bookish in June of 2010 and was moved to That Artsy Reader Girl in January of 2018. It was born of a love of lists, a love of books, and a desire to bring bookish friends together. This week's topic is Top Ten Books Released in 2024 That Didn't Get To

1. Ex Marks the Spot by Gloria Chao
2. Tale of the Heart Queen (Artefacts of Ouranos, # 4) by Nisha J Tuli
3. A Drop of Venom (Venom, # 1) by Sajni Patel
4. A Kingdom to Claim by Sian Ann Bessey
5. The Outlaw Noble Salt by Amy Harmon
6. I Want to Trust You But I Don't by Lysa TerKuerst
7. A Touch of Shadows (The Lost Queen, # 1) by Jessica Thorne
8. Midnights With You by Clare Osongco
9. Nothing Like the Movies (Better Than the Movies, # 1) by Lynn Painter
10. Til Heist Do Us Part (Simi Chopra, # 2) by Sara Desai

Which new releases of 2024 have you still not gotten around to yet? Let me know!

Top Ten Audiobook Narrators

Top Ten Tuesday was created by The Broke and the Bookish in June of 2010 and was moved to That Artsy Reader Girl in January of 2018. It was born of a love of lists, a love of books, and a desire to bring bookish friends together. This week's topic is Top Ten Audiobook Narrators.

1. Lorelai King - I first listened to Lorelai King narrate the Stephanie Plum series and I loved her then. But listening to Charley Davidson series has cemented my love of her audiobook narration.
2. Jessica Elisa Boyd - Sally Britton's novels Sally Britton has been releasing her audiobooks on YouTube and I'm devouring them. I don't think any of my reviews have published yet because review books take priority over books for fun.
3. Jim Dale - narrated the Harry Potter series.
4. Nick Podehl - narrated Carter Finally Gets It which is not my normal type of read at all, but I was rolling listening to this book. Hilarious.
5. Emily Shaffer - narrated the Vampire Academy series. I don't remembering thinking that the audiobook narration blew me away, but I have re-listened to this audiobook series probably seven or so times.
6. Joanna Stephens - narrates the Sisters of Woodside Mysteries series, which I need to finish.
7. Julia Whelan - narrated the Book Lovers by Emily Henry
8. Lysa TerKeurst - narrated her own Forgiving What Your Can't Forget and you could tell she put the emphasis exactly where she intended it to be.
9. Dana K White - narrates her own books Decluttering at the Speed of Life & How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind which makes it sound like you're just sitting down for coffee with a friend to discuss homemaking.
10. Kristen Welch - also narrates her book Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World.

Are there any audiobook narrators that you just love? Let me know!

Forgiving What You Can't Forget - Review

Forgiving What You Can't Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That's Beautiful Again

By: Lysa TerKeurst

Publication: November 17th 2020 by Thomas Nelson

288 pages

Genre: Non-fiction, Self-Help, Christian

Source: eLibrary

( Goodreads | Amazon | Book Depository )

*Note: The above links to Amazon and Book Depository are affiliate links. Affiliate links support giveaways for Somewhere Only We Know readers.

Goodreads description--*#1 New York Times Bestseller*

You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you.

Have you ever felt stuck in a cycle of unresolved pain, playing offenses over and over in your mind? You know you can't go on like this, but you don't know what to do next. Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled through this journey. But in surprising ways, she's discovered how to let go of bound-up resentment and overcome the resistance to forgiving people who aren't willing to make things right.

With deep empathy, therapeutic insight, and rich Bible teaching coming out of more than 1,000 hours of theological study, Lysa will help you:

Learn how to move on when the other person refuses to change and never says they're sorry.
Walk through a step-by-step process to free yourself from the hurt of your past and feel less offended today.
Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out right now.
Identify what's stealing trust and vulnerability from your relationships so you can believe there is still good ahead.
Disempower the triggers hijacking your emotions by embracing the two necessary parts of forgiveness.

I put Forgiving What You Can't Forget audiobook on hold with the elibrary MONTHS ago. And it finally came up time for me to borrow it. I haven't been in the best place to listen to audiobooks anymore as I'm not driving the long distances (THANK GOD!) that I was last year. But I knew this was a book I wanted to listen to ASAP. And I found a way. As a matter of fact, it is rare for me to be able to finish a non-fiction, self-help book this quickly. Usually, I need time to dissect and meditate on the information present, but I couldn't get enough of Forgiving What You Can't Forget.

Yes, I could spend some more time with the content of this book. I would love having a physical or digital copy of the text for re-reading and referencing. But this audiobook was phenomenal. Lysa Terkuerst's narration takes this audiobook to the next level. She knows where the emphasis should be in each sentence. And she also knows where and how much emotion each sentence should include. Being read by anyone else wouldn't have been as impactful.

I wish I could describe the content within this book and make any sense. Lysa's marriage struggles were very public due to the nature of her career. But I believe that God worked through their struggles in so many amazing ways. Obviously, that Lysa and Art were able to reconcile is proof of His work in their marriage. But with God's providence Lysa was able to take some of her deepest pain and with God's help turn it into this book that gives such practical help in forgiving others. He takes what is ugly and broken and dying and makes things that are beautiful, alive, and healed. And I believe that every human would benefit from reading or listening to this book. Lysa doesn't approach this topic from a standpoint of preaching but as a friend who commiserates with you over your own losses and brokenness. She knows just how hard forgiving someone who hurt you deeply is. And she doesn't gloss over the work and the challenges you will and have faced. That's what makes this book special.

Because this was the audio version that I listened to, I don't have any quotes to share, but I know if I'd read the print version I would have no lack of highlighted quotes.

Forgiving What You Can't Forget is a powerful book. Lysa approaches the reader as a friend who hurts over your hurts. She shares so many intimate details of her life, pain, and betrayal that you truly feel like you've just had a long coffee date with a now close pal. You've been through the trenches together. You've laughed, you've screamed, you've cried together. And you're coming out from the clouds to see the sun again. Listening to this book pushed me to finally let go of some hurt I experienced early on in my marriage that I've been carrying in the form of unforgiveness. And I am so thankful for the peace that I felt when I finally felt free enough to let go of the proof of my pain. Thank you Lysa, from the bottom of my heart, for bearing your soul and writing this book. Every human being has suffered a great loss in their life already, or they will before they die. They will be or have been let down by those who are supposed to love them the most. This book will help you. I know that it will. And I'm thankful God led Lysa to share her story and the work He has done in her life. Forgiving What You Can't Forget gets ALL THE STARS, but since my scale only goes up to 5, it gets 5 Stars. Have you read (or listened to) Forgiving What You Can't Forget? What did you think? Let me know!

Top Ten Books I Read in 2022

Top Ten Tuesday was created by The Broke and the Bookish in June of 2010 and was moved to That Artsy Reader Girl in January of 2018. It was born of a love of lists, a love of books, and a desire to bring bookish friends together. This week's topic is Top Ten Books I Read in 2022

1. Meet Me in the Margins by Melissa Ferguson (4.5 Stars)
2. Edward and Amelia by Karen Thronell (4.5 Stars)
3. Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World by Kristen Welch (5 Stars)
4. FLIP the Gratitude Switch by Kevin Clayson (4.5 Stars)
5. From the Jump by Lacie Waldon (4.5 Stars)
6. A Fate of Wrath & Flame (Fate & Flame, # 1) by KA Tucker (4.5 Stars)
7. A Curse of Blood & Stone (Fate & Flame, # 2) by KA Tucker (4.5 Stars)
8. Reminders of Him by Colleen Hoover (5 Stars)
9. Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa TerKeurst (5 Stars)
10. Breath as Prayer: Calm Your Anxiety, Focus Your Mind, and Renew Your Soul by Jennifer Tucker (5 Stars)
11. Book Lovers by Emily Henry (4.5 Stars)
12. A Hard Day for a Hangover (Sunshine Vicram, # 3) by Darynda Jones

Which books were your favorites reads of 2022? Let me know!

Uninvited - Review

Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely

By: Lysa TerKeurst

Publication: August 9th 2016 by Thomas Nelson

240 pages

Genre: Non-fiction

Source: Publisher via NetGalley (Thank you!!)

( Goodreads | Amazon | Book Depository )

*Note: The above links to Amazon and Book Depository are affiliate links. Affiliate links support giveaways for Somewhere Only We Know readers.

Goodreads description--The enemy wants us to feel rejected . . . left out, lonely, and less than. When we allow him to speak lies through our rejection, he pickpockets our purpose. Cripples our courage. Dismantles our dreams. And blinds us to the beauty of Christ’s powerful love.

In Uninvited, Lysa shares her own deeply personal experiences with rejection—from the incredibly painful childhood abandonment by her father to the perceived judgment of the perfectly toned woman one elliptical over.

With biblical depth, gut-honest vulnerability, and refreshing wit, Lysa helps readers:

Release the desire to fall apart or control the actions of others by embracing God-honoring ways to process their hurt. Know exactly what to pray for the next ten days to steady their soul and restore their confidence. Overcome the two core fears that feed our insecurities by understanding the secret of belonging. Stop feeling left out and start believing that "set apart" does not mean "set aside." End the cycle of perceived rejection by refusing to turn a small incident into a full blown issue.

I really enjoyed Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst so when I saw that she had a new book coming out I was excited to check it out. Yet when I read the title and description, I felt like maybe this book wasn't exactly for me. See, I don't tend to get my feelings hurt when others don't invite me to specific events and while I definitely have my struggles, I'm pretty comfortable with who I am and don't feel like I need the approval of others to make me feel valuable. But then I saw it on NetGalley and thought it would be a good one for me to review. And I'm glad that even though I wasn't initially approved, the publisher changed their minds and let me review this one because it was about so much more than not being invited to places or events with others.

The truth is that we have all been rejected in one way or other in various aspects of our lives. Maybe it was a relationship that didn't last, or one that never started, or a job that you didn't get, or a parent that left, or any number of rejections. Lysa shares her personal rejections in the areas of a relationship she once thought would be her forever, a friendship that ended, her father who left, and ministry opportunities that didn't pan out. Her own personal vulnerability in sharing her struggles and her heart helps the reader understand that they are not alone with their own rejections. Ms. TerKeurst's writing style is as easy to read as her stories are relate-able. I highlighted a ton from her wording and her message.

Favorite quotes:

-In the quiet of an early morning, honesty finds me. It calls to me through a crack in my soul and invites the real me to come out, come out, wherever you are.

-As long as I suspect that honesty's intention is to expose me and hurt me, it will always feel like a dangerous thing.

-Rejection steals the best of who I am by reinforcing the worst of what's been said to me.

-Things of this world all eventually reveal what incapable anchors they really are.

-I couldn't keep my old broken beliefs, nail a little Jesus truth to the side, and expect stability.

-We must tie our identities to our unchanging, unflinching, unyielding, undeniably good, and unquestionably loving God.

-...when we go to the truth instead of our feelings for the answer to this question, we can understand God's goodness in a whole new light.

-What consumes my thinking will be the making or the breaking of my identity.

-"God, I want Your truth to be the loudest voice in my life. Correct me. Comfort me. Come closer still. And I will trust. God, You are good at being God."

Truthfully I highlighted so much that I wish I could share them all with you, but I had to cut them off somewhere.

All of this to say that Uninvited was so much more than I first assumed it would be based off the title. Lysa TerKeurst writes in a way that is beautiful at times, moving, and certainly relate-able to all. I'd highly recommend Uninvited to all women (and men too really). I love how she approached the questions "Is God good? Is God good to me? And is God good at being God?" Uninvited gets 4.5 Stars. Have you read Uninvited? What did you think? Let me know!