The 5 Love Languages of Children: The Secret to Loving Children Effectively
By: Gary Chapman & Ross Campbell
Published: May 1st 2016 by Northfield Publishing (first published May 28th 1995)
Genre: Nonfiction, Parenting, Christian, Self-Help
Source: Publisher via NetGalley (Thank you!!)
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Goodreads description--More than 1 million sold! You know you love your child. But how can you show it so they really feel loved? The #1 New York Times bestselling The 5 Love Languages® has helped millions of couples learn the secret to building a love that lasts. Now discover how to speak your child’s love language and make them feel loved in a way they understand. Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Ross Campbell help you:
Discover your child’s love language
Understand the link between successful learning and the love languages
See how the love languages can help you discipline more effectively
Build a foundation of unconditional love for your child
Plus: Find dozens of tips for practical ways to speak your child’s love language. Discover your child's primary language, then speak it, and you will be on your way to a stronger relationship and seeing your child flourish.
For a free online study guide, visit 5lovelanguages.com
My parents introduced me to The Five Love Languages when I was still a teenager. It was instantly intrigued by the idea of five different ways that people show and receive love. So when the opportunity came up to read The Five Love Languages of Children I was excited to pick it up since I've become a mother. The idea of loving my child in the best ways possible was easily something that I wanted to learn more about.
It has been at least ten years since I read The Five Love Languages; however, I didn't find The Five Love Languages of Children to be too terribly different. The love languages (Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service, and Gifts) are the same. From what I could tell, the examples surrounded the love languages were obviously geared toward parents and children. Also, there were sections devoted to parenting philosophy and the nature of children whereas the original book focused more on the spouse and romantic love relationships. But overall, I feel like you could probably get away with reading one of these books and applying the concepts to both sets of relationships (or any relationship really).
That being said, I still really enjoyed The Five Love Languages of Children and I read it quite quickly given the amount of time I have to read these days. Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell had plenty of good and wise things to say about raising children and I highlighted up a storm.
Here are some of my favorite quotes:
-Speaking your child's primary love language does not mean he or she will not rebel later. It does mean your child will know you love him, and that can bring him security and hope...
-Unconditional love is a full love that accepts and affirms a child for who he is, not for what he does.
-Your children will sense how you feel about them by how you behave toward them.
-Affection and love mean expressing appreciation for the very being of a child, for those characteristics and abilities that are part of the total package of the person. In contrast, we express praise for what the child does, either in achievements or behavior or conscious attitudes.
-...much childhood misbehavior is an attempt to get more time with Mom or Dad.
-Don't let your demonstration of love to a child be controlled by whether the child is pleasing you at the moment.
-Your children need to see in you the traits you want them to develop.
-Discipline comes from a Greek word that means "to train." Discipline involves the long and vigilant task of guiding a child from infancy to adulthood. The goal is that the child would reach a level of maturity that will allow him one day to function as a responsible adult in society.
-Love looks out for the interest of another; so does discipline.
-Practice unconditional love; then discipline.
-Raising children always requires more time than you expected.
Personally, I really enjoyed the section dedicated to discipline. The authors address that discipline and punishment aren't synonymous. While I without a doubt knew that both of my parents loved me I definitely grew up in a household where punishment was the main form of discipline. It wasn't always about training me in the direction that I needed to go so much as punishing me for the not going the direction I should. Or it felt that way at the time. Anyway, I won't go into all of that here, but I enjoyed the authors spending time on this subject and really enforcing that a child should be loved and feel loved unconditionally no matter how unappealing their behavior might be.
The Five Love Languages of Children gets 4 Stars from me. It's an information packed book with easy concepts to implement into your daily life in hopes that your children will feel more loved. I do think that this is a book that you might continually need to come back to and re-read for a refresher every once and a while. Have you read The Five Love Languages of Children? What did you think? Let me know!